This question is so common and annoying that it has made its way onto this site. It occurs to me that one of the most difficult aspects of being a writer is that we have to constantly be talking about how we aren’t coming onto our friends or family. This kind of feeling happens when we feel like we are coming over and are trying to initiate contact.
It’s a problem because people feel the need to come over and initiate contact with you, even if they don’t really want to. This is especially true when we are talking about our close friends and family. We think this is because we live in a social context and it takes time for our social skills to develop. But it also happens when we write because we have to talk about our feelings and frustrations. We can only feel comfortable talking about these things to people we like.
To be able to initiate a close friendship or family relationship it takes a lot of practice. This is why we have good boundaries. I think this is also why we have to come up with some really good excuses for not initiating contact.
But in this day and age, when all our social skills are so much better we can just say no. There is a way to get over our feelings when we don’t want you to be around us. We can say “hey, I’m really sorry, I’m just not in the mood right now. Thank you for the compliment.” Or we can get angry and shout, “I’m sorry.
There are many ways to get an apology out of someone. All of them are equally effective and all of them can be a bit more awkward than if we were to say, “Hey, sorry I called you a name; I didn’t mean it.” If we were to say that to our friends, or to our parents, we’d be the first to be surprised and the last to apologize.
We all have our reasons for doing stuff. Some of them are true, and some of them aren’t. It’s a matter of perspective.
We all have our reasons for going along with what we do. Sometimes we get angry because we’re not being taken seriously, and sometimes we get mad because we’re being taken too seriously. The best thing to do to get an apology out of someone is to just let them talk. We don’t have to listen at all.
Sometimes we want to tell you something that we are not sure you want to hear. Sometimes we want to share a secret that might upset you or make you uncomfortable. Its just a matter of perspective. It is not fair to expect people to give you their whole heart.
Sometimes we want to share our deepest feelings. Sometimes we want to tell you that we feel you are wrong. You dont have to agree 100% with us. Sometimes we want to share a secret we dont want to share with anyone else. Thats ok too.
Well, it’s not ok if you don’t want to share this with us. If you don’t want us to talk to you, we will not talk to you.
